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Andrew Calder
| Nickname | Calder |
| Date Of Birth | 22/10/81 |
| Place Of Birth | Glasgow |
| Big Team | Newcastle United |
| Wee Team | Dumbarton |
| Favourite Player Ever | Faustino Asprilla |
| Position | Handy all around the pitch but excels in midfield or up front |
| Distinguishing Features | Barcode top, blistering pace, eye for goal, phenomenal heading ability - he's the Real's version of CR7, basically |
| Lookalike | Tennis grump Andy Murray, Bayern
full back Philipp Lahm, Mikael Arteta of Arsenal
(scowl only), Jan Kirchoff of Sunderland, Juan
Mata or a less smiley James Maddison. From the oval ball game, there's England fly half George Ford, too. |
| Battlecry | "Come out, come out ... quickly!"
(if Bill is on his team) / "Shoot!" (if Bill isn't
on his team). Also uttered the legendary "It's not f*cking TIDDLYWINKS!" after Brian Latto blew for a foul in one of our 11s games. |
| Claim To Fame |
First Real player to namecheck the Sons Of The Rock in his profile! Used to live across the road from the Stadium Of Dark. Spends more time on Arran than most people who
actually live there. Despite not feeling the cold and never wearing
long sleeves, he's not actually a
Geordie. |
| Road To The Real | One of many players to arrive via the Wee Fahd / Stu Blackhall pipeline |
| Debut Date |
9/6/09 |
| 8s Appearances in 2009 | 15 out of 46 (33%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2010 | 41 out of 43 (95% - highest) |
| 8s Appearances in 2011 | 47 out of 49 (96% - highest) |
| 8s Appearances in 2012 | 32 out of 49 (65%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2013 | 30 out of 48 (63%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2014 | 27 out of 50 (54%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2015 | 22 out of 51 (43%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2016 | 28 out of 50 (56%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2017 | 30 out of 49 (61%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2018 | 29 out of 46 (63%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2019 | 29 out of 50 (58%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2020 | 12 out of 18 (67%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2021 | 11 out of 32 (34%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2022 | 22 out of 47 (47%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2023 | 30 out of 47 (64%) |
| 8s Appearances in 2024 | 10 out of 49 (20%) |
| Total Appearances | 415 (4th highest) |